This book was a book that I could really sink my teeth into. Mary Ellen Geist is a reporter at heart. She was an afternoon anchor on WCBS Radio in New York, a morning anchor on KGO Radio in San Francisco and a reporter in the Los Angeles area; until, she came home to Michigan to help her mother in caregiving duties for her father who is living his life under assualt of the disease of Alzheimers. Alzheimers is a cruel disease that steals memories, abilities, independence, and the ability to connect to others in the same way that they did before the plaque started to attack the pathways in the brain of those affected.
Mary Ellen holds very little back as she gains experience, wisdom and skills in sharing the caregiving responsibilities, with her mother, for her father. I found the book to be very interesting as it stretches the heart, the mind and the soul of the reader to understand the range of care that is involved in caring for a loved one throughout all the stages of Alzheimers. The book is not only a personal journey of discovery it is also a good guide book on common experiences of what to do and what not to do for those in the same situation. The book is an important text on taking daily stock of what is working today, and what is not, to allow the most amount of independence while balancing the safety and well-being of the patient.
As the children and spouses, of those affected by Alzheimers, struggle to provide a safety net of love and support…it is important to recognize what they also give up in their quest to provide family based care. The daily losses are a sad reminder to make every moment count with those that we care about. But the real nuggets of gold seem to be in finding the small moments of joy when something works, when a special memory comes forth just at the right moment…when a caregiver begins to wonder whether what they are trying to provide their loved one with is really worth the effort and the sacrifice. For those who are in more of a combative situation with the loved one (usually in the latter stages of the disease) it is important for the caregiver to constantly remind themselves that this is the disease talking and acting out…not their loved one! It is important not to take things personally when there are disagreements, accusations and verbal outbursts.
More importantly, it is extremely imperitive that the caregiver have back up help that they trust. You must find “me” time…because it is easy to lose yourself in the grind of meeting the other person’s needs 24/7. Taking care of oneself when you are a full-time caregiver is a must; caregivers often loose their own health and well-being in trying to give so much to another human being. It is an act of love and commitment to care for your own well-being; because if you aren’t well balanced physically and emotionally…you will have nothing left to give.
What Mary Ellen and her mother have been able to provide her father with, is dignity. They do this even though the web of the disease tries to remove the basic components of who the alzheimers patient really is. Their memories and their daily habits seem to vanish one by one until there remains a shadowy shell of the original personality. But, the strength and courage of families faced with this disease is of heroic proportions. They fight tooth and nail to bring him back to them daily, through his lifelong loves of tennis and music. Music is the connector for “Woody”, Mary Ellen’s father. He is able to sing lyrics from songs that he sang with an acapella group for most of his life; that is an achievement for someone who struggles to remember associations between words and objects during conversations. This is the magic that allows Woody to connect with people and events that otherwise would be lost to him and his family.
In a way, Woody’s caregivers use music like others would use medication. It is their umbilical cord to the wandering soul of the man they love. This book will make you laugh, cry, and it will make you joyous for each moment of overcoming and connecting. It is eye opening to those who face a future of caregiving. It is encouraging for those in the midst of commitment to caregiving for another. And it is a life lesson in determining how far you are willing to go to keep someone with you who may or may not remember who you are…even though you remember all about your relationship. Memories become both a blessing and a curse as it can wound you as a caregiver, to no longer have the same intensity of connection in the patient’s mind to mutual people, places or events from the past and present.
Measure of the Heart was published in 2008 by Springboard Press. You can visit their website: http://www.HachetteBooksGroupUSA.com . Or, you can visit the author’s website here: http://maryellengeist.com/content/index.asp .
This book has been interesting to read. It was written by Lee Iacocca. Lee has been instrumental in the automotive industry most of his life. He has a way of getting right to the heart of the matter when he discusses business and the approach that leaders in the industry must take when running a huge corporation.
There is much insider background that he shares from the last two or three decades in the industry. It is informative since we are still struggling to save the big three from financial ruin. This, at present time, is a place in history where the government is going to have to work hand -in-hand with business to have a positive outcome in these difficult financial times.
Mr. Iacocca shares his years of hard won wisdom with us. I like the fact that he talks about the qualities that a person must have to be an effective leader. He talks about mistakes and failures and how you can learn from them to be a better leader. With the automotive industry making the news daily in their efforts to survive…it would be a positive benefit for our new President elect Barack Obama to tap into the knowledge that Mr. Iacocca has in the automotive industry to try to strengthen their stake in the business world. If President elect Obama did that…he would begin to illustrate the kind of effective leader that the United States of America needs right now.
Where have all the leaders gone was copyrighted in 2007 and was published by Thorndike Press. You can visit their websites at: www.gale.com/thorndikepress or www.thomson.com.
Rainy’s Recommendations
